Tuesday, September 15, 2009

The art of being happy for others

Everyone has an ego... some more than others. That's when the braggarts are born.

Why do people brag? To give themselves a little ego boost or to belittle others... or both. Are they happier after that ego boost??? Nope... ego-boost is like a drug, you'll just crave more and more of it. Some people even live out of their means and get into serious financial trouble due to this "drug".

It is also highly contagious... if a person is around ego-boosters all the time, chances are, it rubs off on them and they become addicts themselves unless they have super high self control and humility to bring them back to earth. Or they have a "wake-up-call" buddy to slap them back to earth everytime.

Does pride and ego = happiness? Far from it.

Friend says: I got promoted!!
Egoholic: I am also in the running for a promotion at work.

Friend says: I just got engaged!!!
Egoholic: Gosh, what a tiny diamond you got.

Friend says: I'm pregnant!!
Egoholic: Eeew... babies are so disgusting.

Friend says: Welcome to my housewarming dinner!
Egoholic: Such a small place. I just went to see a much bigger more expensive place. Thinking of buying it.

Does putting others down make the egoholic feel better or happier? We've all been in the egoholics shoes at least once in our lifetime. Did we feel good after putting people down? Nope, from my experience, it followed by a feeling of excruciating envy.

So why do they still do it? Beats me... as I have learnt the art of being happy for others. That way, I have more share of happiness... mine as well as a gazillion other people's happiness. Yup, it's happiness melimpah-limpah... :)

The next time you feel compelled to react egoistically to a friend or family's happiness, step back and think how would you feel if you are in their shoes. When you receive a happy news... would you want someone who shares your excitement or someone who belittles it?

Perhaps next time you can learn how to "tap on" to others' happiness, the art of being happy for others. Even if the good news for them may not be good news for you, you can still be happy for them.

Friend says: I got promoted!!
Egoholic: Oh wow!! Congratulations... with all the hard work & stress you've been through... you deserve it!! :)

Friend says: I just got engaged!!!
Egoholic: I'm so happy for you!! Finally reaching for your happy ever after eh? :)

Friend says: I'm pregnant!!
Egoholic: Congrats!! You've always wanted to be mom! Now I can have 2nd hand experience of being a mom hearing mommy stories from you, since I've decided not to have my own. :)

Friend says: Welcome to my housewarming dinner!
Egoholic: Thanks for inviting me into your brand new home. Must be exciting to have your own place! :)

Trust me, you'll be a much happier person even if you don't outdo them. :)

2 comments:

Aragang said...

That's so true. They suck the energy right out of you and ruin the moment by stealing your spotlight. Good tips, too. Thanks for sharing!

Shannon said...

me like this post!